Escape

Jul. 31st, 2003 09:57 pm
zyzyly: (Default)
[personal profile] zyzyly
Yesterday was a strange day, full of tears. I wrote a long entry about it, but decided not to post it. I went to work today, and after a few hours decided I needed a day off--from everything.

I got in the car and started driving west. I stopped halfway at Sam's Club and bought a shirt and jeans to replace my work clothes. I ended up at Point Reyes, which is part of the Golden Gate National Recreation Area, north of San Francisco. It is one of the most beautiful and tranquil places in the world, and a place that never fails to restore me.

It was foggy there, like it often is, and there were a few drops of rain. Perfect weather.

cowfog




I took many pictures and had a nice lunch at The Station. Later on, I drove south on Highway 1 a little ways and stopped at the cemetery where Grandpa and I always stopped to eat our lunch.

prayer

It was Grandpa who introduced me to the secret places of Point Reyes. When I was trying to stop drinking, he dedicated many days days driving me all over the area, showing me the places he would go to renew his spirit. He wanted me to understand there was true beauty in the world--things that were worth living for. "Life is so beautful"--he told me that, and he meant it.

Now his secret places are my secret places, and they never fail to renew my sagging spirits. I brought Arlina to Point Reyes after we had been dating for about a month, and showed her the secret places of my heart. I love her so much that sometimes it hurts. There are no words for it.

oh, lord

Date: 2003-07-31 10:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ms-priestypants.livejournal.com
I can only imagine what sort of news would require a new change of clothes. As always, you are both in my hopes and prayers, but if you ever have the need, email me.

Re: oh, lord

Date: 2003-07-31 10:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myasma.livejournal.com
Oh no, there was nothing like that. I just needed different clothes because I was going to be hiking around , and didn't want to do that in my work slacks and shirt.

Things are actually going fairly well, but the emotion tends to accumulate, and I'm not that good at expressing it until it all wells up and overflows. I envy your ability to lay it all out in your LJ--good and bad.

Again, thank you for your prayers!

Date: 2003-07-31 10:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fathoming.livejournal.com
Thank you for this beautiful post. It took my breath away.

Date: 2003-08-01 12:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zhenzhi.livejournal.com
how beautiful that your grandpa shared his joy of life and these places with you. :-)

i find there is great comfort, and renewal, as you say, in visiting places of heart. your photos convey that feeling. life and hope. and love.

Date: 2003-08-01 01:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] capricornsun.livejournal.com
... with you, in thoughts. Wish I had someone in my life to feel this kind of things with me, so Arlina is lucky to have you. HugZ

Date: 2003-08-01 04:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ex-muzer409.livejournal.com
Beauty. Sadness. Beauty. Love. Beauty.

Date: 2003-08-01 04:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ldygwynedd.livejournal.com
You are really quite a wonderful photographer. I wish I had your touch.

You both are still in my prayers every night.

Date: 2003-08-01 04:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ineedcoffee.livejournal.com
everyone needs secret places.

When my husband and I had been dating a while, we went up to the N. Georgia mountains where he grew up and went to school, around Tallulah Falls. My dad used to take me there when I was a child, and we both knew the area like the backs of our hands. It was so amazing that his favorite, private places were also mine. It is one of the most gorgeous and meaningful places in my life.

We're moving there next month, if all goes well.

I love him so much it hurts too. And I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Date: 2003-08-01 05:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] paperbooks.livejournal.com
It all sounds perfect and beautiful. I want to hide away in your pocket so I can see these places too. You're grandfather sounds amazing.

Date: 2003-08-01 05:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myasma.livejournal.com
You're welcome!

Date: 2003-08-01 05:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myasma.livejournal.com
My grandpa was such a strong positive influence on me. It's nice to visit these places and walk with him again.

Date: 2003-08-01 05:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myasma.livejournal.com
Thank you. My wish for you is that you find that someone.

Date: 2003-08-01 05:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myasma.livejournal.com
Yes, yes, yes, yes and yes.

Date: 2003-08-01 05:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myasma.livejournal.com
Thank you! Knowing that you are out there makes me happy.

Date: 2003-08-01 05:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myasma.livejournal.com
Ahhhh, to move to one of your favorite places! I've been following your story--I hope it all comes together.

Date: 2003-08-01 05:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myasma.livejournal.com
He was amazing. One day I'll write more about him.

Date: 2003-08-01 06:35 am (UTC)

Date: 2003-08-01 06:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tallulahmae.livejournal.com
Your pictures always touch my heart. Your grandpa sounds really special. Arlina is very lucky to have you. :)

Date: 2003-08-01 09:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mrshannibal.livejournal.com
you are always in my thoughts and prayers. plus, you're an excellent photographer. how wonderful the relationship you had with your grandfather. my son has that with my dad. secret places are good to have. when i need to get away and just get out there - i walk the cliff house, you know - the sutro baths? i just love it there. may god hold you and arlina close to his heart. take care.

Date: 2003-08-01 09:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myasma.livejournal.com
I used to know a bartender at the Cliffhouse. Whenever we'd go there, he would give us all the free kamikazes we could drink. One night I fell of the edge of the cliff--and my friend reached out and grabbed my arm.

But I love it out there on a foggy day.

Date: 2003-08-01 10:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mrshannibal.livejournal.com
have gone there for dinner many a time. i can still remember the "playland" sign that was up across the street. lots of history and beautiful place. there was an excellent, and riveting photo you took of a young boy - just half of his face. my gawd! the camera loves that child. what a great shot! you are really good.

hope

Date: 2003-08-01 12:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whipporwill.livejournal.com
Hello,

I'm very touched by and glad to have found your journal, which I linked to through your recent comment to a mutual friend, our dear +[profile] seraphimsigrits. I also read and looked at your update journal. It felt like knowing you and Arlina. I'm adding you into my prayers even as I write this, and will add Arlina's name to those whom we pray for during Liturgy. Like you, I know how pain is, and joy. And hope.

With love and prayers,

Beryl

Re: hope and oops!

Date: 2003-08-01 12:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whipporwill.livejournal.com
who am I talking about, you ask? Who is this plus sign? I messed up, as usual. Our mutual friend is (hope this works) [livejournal.com profile] seraphimsigrist

Re: hope and oops!

Date: 2003-08-01 12:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myasma.livejournal.com
I knew that's who you meant!

Re: hope

Date: 2003-08-01 12:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myasma.livejournal.com
We thank you for your prayers!

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