Big Trash Grinch

[zyzyly]

My next-door neighbor rang my doorbell a little while ago. This is unusual, because he generally pretends I don't exist. I'm not sure why. When we moved in here a few years ago, I went around and introduced myself to everyone. He was the only neighbor who didn't tell me his name. I still wave to him and say hi and stuff, but he generally doesn't respond. His wife always smiles, though. Oh, and I know his name--it's Larry. I think he's a lawyer or something.

So I answer the door, and he says, "Hi, did you put a bunch of paint cans in my trash heap yesterday?" Well, I didn't, and I said so.

I guess someone came around on Big Trash Eve and buried a couple of bags full of paint cans in his heap. When the Big Trash guys came around, they pulled them out and tossed them up onto Larry's lawn. They won't take stuff like that. Paint, chemicals, dead animals--all forbidden.

After my denial of responsibility, he goes on to point out that it myst have been someone around here, because we live in a pretty out-of-the-way neighborhood. Well, it wasn't me, Larry.

This really bothers me. I have lived a few feet away from this guy for over three years now, and have always tried to be a decent neighbor. As far as I know, I have never done anything to give the impression that I would sabotage his Big Trash. If they had picked my pile instead of his, it would never have occurred to me that it might have been him (he?) that did it.

I feel a strong urge to go over and knock on his door and either:
a. ask him why he thought I would do something like that, or
b. tell him to fuck off.

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chandra/]

I vote for B!

[myasma.livejournal.com]

I knew you would!

[drood.livejournal.com]

"Hi Larry! You know, I was thinking, I don't know who put those paint cans there, but if you do notice some medical waste and oh, about a pound of destabilized uranium filings, could you fish them out for me? I think I accidentally threw my dead hamster in with them, and I've decided to resurrect him in a voodoo ritual at midnight. Ta, thanks ever so."

[myasma.livejournal.com]

ha!